S1 Ep26: There's No Place like Gnome

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The views and opinions expressed by hosts and listeners on the Astonishing Dead Letter office are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Astonishing Legends Productions, the Astonishing Legends Network, or any affiliated entities or guests. When something unexplainable happens to you, it can make you feel isolated or alone. But trust us, you're not. For over a decade, you've been sending your strange stories to Astonishing Legends. And now it's time for our fellow legenders to hear them too. Join us weekly in Blanket Fortiana as we dig through your intriguing messages to the Astonishing Dead Letter office. Tonight's episode, There's No Place Like Gnome. So, although I know you prepped the outline on this one, I feel like there's almost zero chance you didn't make a bad dad joke about gnomes in this letter. Wait, do you have any gnome jokes? No, I don't have any right out of the gate. And my son gets mad at me about the dad jokes. I think the only one I did, I'll say the only one I did was in the titling of this episode, which I called There's No Place Like Gnome. Well, I happen to like it a lot. So, there you go. You got my vote on that one. Very clever. Or in all seriousness, though, we've had a handful of listeners and friends of the show who have written in or told us about encountering what could only be described as classic fairy tale gnome beings, little entities. And I'm glad you brought that up because we love these kind of stories, gnomes and pukwudges and fairy folk and whatever else. These are great for the Dead Letter office. So, if you have something like that, because this is the other thing. It's like I said with the ones that we've already covered too. We might need to do a custom dead letter that's just feedback from the dead letters we've already done. Because there's some really cool stuff coming in. A soldier had written in who I think had previously been deployed and was just like, all of the people I knew who were deployed in different conflicts had a ton of stories. And he goes, they come back and they talk about it for a little bit and then they just stop or they don't want to talk about it. So, I have a feeling there's a lot of those out there. I would love to hear more of those. I think if you guys can send those in to us. But also, gnomes and weird little tiny people, those are perfect for the dead letters. So, if you have something like that and it's a story that maybe you've forgotten about until just now or you were afraid to tell people because you thought they'd make fun of you, it's a safe space as they say. We're totally fine. We'll use a pseudonym for you or whatever. Send it in to deadletteroffice at astonishinglegends.com. We'd love to see it. Well, one friend of the show, become a friend of ours that we started talking with is Amelia Cotter. Now, she did a junk drawer with us. Junk drawer 20. There you go. Junk drawer 20. See how fast. Well, what one of the big takeaways was is that, especially with gnomes, and it's funny. If you mention shadow people, you might get a jokester here and there saying like, oh, maybe you should cut back on the pseudofed. But a lot of people that have experienced it, it's frightening. But we're maybe more apt to believe in things like that that are just downright scary and part of the genre. Where here, we associate gnomes with childhood fairy tales and folklore and all the fun stuff. And they're fun little creatures. And we keep, they're in our travel ads for Travelocity. And they're in our gardens. I mean, it doesn't seem like you should be afraid of them. But one odd thing that Amelia had mentioned in her story, and then also, I believe, her uncles who saw something like that. And then comically, of course, you saw the rustling off, darting away at high speed into the brush. And leaves were being kicked up like a, you know, like a high speed rabbit. But obviously, it was something that was not rabbit and more gnome-like. Like, the appearance of one was kind of like it was gray, like it was in black and white of sorts and a little fuzzy. Oh, yeah, man. I can't. I'm not. When things start bending that appearance, like what, you know, like the werewolf that was a straight line when it turned sideways. Oh, right. And something's black and white in a color world. I'm just like, I don't want to see things darting around. Oh, no. And also, especially when you look at them and they duck back to hide behind a piece of furniture. I'm like, I'm nuking from space. It's the only way to be sure. Well, we have another good friend of the show who she reports, I think, in her parents' basement, there is something that is a bit of a trickster because it darts back and forth, like in the hallway, in the doorway. And then we'll see a hand kind of wrap around one of the door frames. No, no, no. No, thank you. Yeah. Although, I will say this. If when you leave that thing and you leave wherever it's at and it doesn't go with you in any way, shape, or form, I'm better with it. It's when it hangs out with you for a few months after. That's the part I really don't. Well, like all guests, invited or not, you can ask and it may happen. And there might be some rules attached to that. If you do ask politely, they do have to respect your wishes. We also get a lot of stories where people do ask not to be bothered again. And if it's something that is non-malicious, it will often heed your wishes and leave you alone, at least for a while. All right. Well, this is a great letter, Forrest. Why don't you do the honors tonight? All right. Thank you very much. Here we go. Hi. My name is Leah, and I currently live in the north of Europe with my fiancée. I was listening to the first part of the Strange Intruders episode, and I listened to the Rebecca story, and it's pretty similar to my experience, although with a slightly different setting, I guess. I was probably around her age when I started practicing Wicca by myself. No coven. I didn't have any experience during rituals or when I was casting circles since my goal was merely religious, and I didn't see the need to go into divination slash spellcraft territory. The only time I had anything weird happen to me was during my sleep paralysis episodes. I forgot to mention my house I used to live with my parents in the south of Europe is as old as me. I'm 33, and the land was thick forest before we built anything there, so no cemeteries, no old stone circles, nothing of that sort. It always happened in the sleep paralysis, like I mentioned. I would wake up unable to move besides my eyes, and I would see them coming out of the shadows in the corners of the room. Small in size, about my height at the time, very willowy, with something pointy on their heads that resembled a gnome hat. Even though you couldn't see any semblance of clothes, they reminded me of garden gnomes in a way. The first time I was very scared and firmly closed my eyes until I regained control over my body again and saw that the room was empty. That situation made me afraid to sleep in my bedroom at night, thinking that I would see them again when I was incapacitated in my paralysis episode. But at the same time, very curious, given the whole Wicca thing and the opportunity to communicate with something from the other side, which I tried to do in broad daylight because I was afraid of not being able to see properly. A few weeks passed with no more strangeness or episodes, until a night after one of the major Sabbaths. I woke up feeling the very familiar weight on my limbs and slowly opened my eyes, already feeling something was different in the bedroom. They were oozing out of the shadows. This time, I kept my eyes open, and they noticed it because they got close very quickly. I was terrified they were going to do something bad to me and tried to scream, Get away from me! But my mouth wouldn't move, and only a small whimper came out. One of the little imps, or gnomes, whatever they are, jumped on the bed, standing over me, waving its little black hand in front of my face, and with a laugh, did a backflip and landed at the foot of the bed, bowing like a performer in front of an audience. After that, the four or five imps moved in a very peculiar way, backwards to where they came from, never changing poses, and slowly melted back into the shadows. Their disappearance matched the moment I started to regain feeling in my body. I scrambled to turn on the light, but there was nothing there. Every sleep paralysis episode since then has had some sort of experience with them. I don't get them as often anymore, and since my mid-twenties, stopped practicing Wicca, turning to other neo-pagan practices instead. For the last episode, I was in Norway with my fiancé, and I saw one of the imps on the top of the dresser waving at me before fading away. I don't think they are out to hurt me. They feel more like playful beings than anything. I've never felt threatened, even after I overcame my fear of them. I also don't think I summoned them, but when you cast a circle, you put yourself in the lands between, so I guess they could have come through somehow, or they're just part of me now, since I still see them an entire continent away from where it all started for me. Wow. So, first of all, Leah, we want to thank you so much for sending this in. This is a great dead letter. I also wanted to point out, you know, folks are like, oh, wow, she's practicing Wiccan. You know, I'm sure some people are going to be freaked out about that, but here's one thing I want to say, and I think Forrest feels the same way. You can tell me if you don't, Forrest, but it's like, we want to hear your experiences regardless of the frame for them. Don't worry about judgment. We're not going to do that. We just want to, like, hear about the crazy things that are happening, and sometimes those things happen on the edge of belief systems that are outside the mainstream. So, this is a very fascinating story to me. If you're sincere about it, we're open to hearing it, and don't pass judgment. But I will say, we've got more than a fair share of emails that start off, this all started when I started practicing Wicca. That's true. But, I mean, that's an access point to the, you know, to the other side, you know? Yeah, I like the point she makes about the feelings you get. I often ask people, I know some folks think it's kind of silly to ask what people were feeling, but a lot of times that's all we have to go off of, of what's happening here. What's the truth? What is posing as something else, and what can you believe or trust? And she said she didn't feel like she conjured anything, but you are working with the spirit world. So, maybe something slipped through, or you made it more of an open access point, the veil got a little bit thinner, or they noticed that you're open to noticing them, which seems to have happened here. It's like, oh, you can see us, or you're open to us. Oh, yeah, that's our favorite Hadam Mothman quote. You notice them, and they noticed that you noticed them. Yeah, which is why that's great, because I think it's not one-sided. It's not just a view through the looking glass. The looking glass works both ways, and it's also staring or shouting into the void. It shouts or stares back. So, it's a two-way communication, and I think in this case, obviously, there's a little bit of impishness in the sense of the word of prankster-ish, of the trickster element here. No, pranks were necessarily pulled, but it's like, it's a little performance. It's like, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, and here's the little backflip. Yeah, the cute little thing. Also, by the way, I think when you shout into the void, and it shouts back, that's somebody who fell in when they were trying to get the perfect selfie. That could very well be, and you're just ignoring them. That's what you get. You shouldn't have gone over the railing. But here, who knows why? Like I said, some people who don't practice anything get these visits and see these things, and then others, I think you do make yourself a little more open to the experience. And that's my feeling of what happened here, is that even though, I don't think you did any specific spells, but when you just do the practice outside and beyond of just reading some books, practice has effect. I think that's what I'm getting at here, is that obviously, thinking about stuff, and I firmly believe in intention, having action in the real world. Thoughts are things, in my belief system. Here, you're actually doing the practices, and you're looking for some other effect, but other times, some visitors come with it. Yeah. And also, by the way, here we are again, and we talk about the trickster a lot over the years, we have whatever, but it's like, here we are again with this cute little beings, cute little things, kind of funny, not threatening. Are they being that way on purpose? I was actually listening today, our friend Tom Maxwell, who was on the main show not too long ago, talking about bloodfalls, because he's an expert on that, former frontman for the Squirrel Nut Zippers. He has a new podcast out called Gods, Ghosts, and UFOs, which has two episodes out so far. I was listening to one today, enjoyed it very much. But one of the things they talked about, I think in their pilot episode, was the brain is being thought of as more of a filter. They were talking a lot about, in their second episode, the perception of time as being nonlinear, and that we're only in the present. You can go forward and backwards, and all of this kind of stuff. But the brain, also this idea that it's a filter for reality. It's not really showing you what's there, it's filtering what's there for you, which I think about when I think about these tricksters, and these cute little things that keep showing up in a lot of these dead letters, by the way. And again, it's always like, I feel like we're mentioning Terry Lovelace in every freaking episode. Well, it covers a lot. That was a very comprehensive experience. Yeah, he struck a chord there. Well, as they say, and I think science proves this out, you don't really see with your eyes, you see with your brain. Right. The eyes are lenses, and your brain interprets what you're seeing. So there's a lot of room for electromagnetic shenanigans in there, electro-biochemical responses that are different slightly for each person. But then, again, I like to notice and take note of the similarities. And so then we're back to the dress, the little pointy hat. I would be especially freaked out if she mentioned a tunic, like Amelia Cotter did. Right. The tunic with the belt. It's kind of, like I said, and I think maybe when people start describing things like that, the more disbelieving will start to, you'll lose them. Yeah, yeah. Oh, come on. It had little pointy curly shoes with the belt, really? Oh, it was the little guy from the Little Caesars commercial. Yeah, the pilgrim buckle. And yeah, like I said, the green and the red coloring here. So we've had similarities in that dress. And who makes the rules about how they should dress? It's you in your imagination. Or is it, as we often say, the reverse, where the reason that kind of imagery is mentioned in folklore and artwork throughout the ages is because that's what they look like. And people have described what they've actually seen. And there's a reason that we all kind of know what a gnome looks like. You go out into your garden, you know, the little beards and the playful nature. And the personality also of these types of beings is that they're there. And again, this is also something other listeners and Amelia have mentioned in that their nature is also that the animation that she turned us on to. That I don't, it was narrated by Christopher Plummer, I believe. And I can't think of it off the top of my head. But they describe the nature of gnomes in that they've got work to do, whatever they're doing for themselves. And they don't really have time to mess with you. It's not like their purpose is to just kind of screw with you and frighten you or they want some fear energy out of you. They are off about their own business. And occasionally they get seen and they like to run away. They're more shy. And sometimes it's also said you only see them if they want you to see them. So there's that. But it sounds like they get surprised sometimes. Like every other creature we've heard of. Praying mantis beings. Gray aliens. Sometimes, you know, shadow beings. They're like, what, you can see me? Yeah. I love that aspect of it. All right. So let's look at the other side of this, though. Let's look at the counterpoint to this. It's like, well, what if this is just, you know, it's a coincidence that she's, at the time, was practicing Wiccan. What if it's just sleep paralysis and she's just hallucinating? She's waking up. She's on the end, which I think people who hear this might be like, well, yeah, that explains it. You know, and that's why she saw it in Norway. It wasn't, you know, didn't matter where she was geographically because it's in her mind anyway. She's just experiencing a typical sort of sleep paralysis where you wake up, which I think has happened to a lot of us. We talked about it on the main show. You wake up and it's like, oh, my God, there's a dude in the corner. And it's like you look at it and it's literally a coat rack or your sweater, your dry cleaning or whatever. What do you think about that? I think we're back to, I don't have a term for it. The three possibilities of everything here is either there's no possible way it's a gnome because those don't exist. On the other end, it's like, yeah, gnomes exist. And it was probably a gnome. Sounds like them. That sounds like what they would do. Or something in the middle where gnomes exist, but is this a case of actually seeing a gnome or is it just, like I said, a subconscious biochemical response from your brain putting that image in? And we've all seen that image as kids and in folklore and bedtime stories and fairy tales. And so obviously that's what popped into your head. What we have here, though, is sleep paralysis. And it's like, okay, so then it comes down to what do you believe personally? I think that the subconscious is a gateway to the other realm as well. We get so many stories about people getting messages from the other side through dreams. We've had many Dead Letter Office episodes so far talking about a very meaningful dream that had real world connection to it. And that's the medium of the language. The medium is the message. So is that you have this way of communicating that facilitates these communication between these types of realms. And that's the way to do it. And then sometimes it's in the middle of the day. And you're fully wide awake. It's like, okay, I'm not dreaming. Back when we had the show, Sarah and the Spider Woman, because we had mentioned the only time, I think, that we've, according to the listener, actually possibly saved someone's life with an episode of Astonishing Legends. Because she was reacting to us talking about a book called Brain on Fire, My Month of Madness by Susanna Cahalan, who had anti-NMDA receptor encephalitis. And we were talking about that in relation to another episode. And then Sarah heard this, who was a listener of the show, and it turned out to be a diagnosis she was having. You can go back and listen to that. Just look up Sarah and the Spider Woman if you want to hear that. But my point is that we do know, as a result of that, that, you know, certain conditions can cause you to see some pretty crazy stuff. Oh, sure. Because she saw some amazing stuff that, to her, seemed super, super real. And does, to a lot of people who have that very, very rare condition that I mentioned, anti-NMDA receptor encephalitis, which I think has since been renamed, possibly. But anyway, not to take the wind out of the sails of Leah's story here. I'm not saying I don't believe her story. I'm just saying, I try to think about all the possibilities. I know that biologically, our minds are capable of producing this imagery. But it's the same thing that I'll say when we talked about Sarah's episode. It's like, you have to wonder, and this is a question as old as time. I think it goes back to the earliest philosophers. It's like, if these things are being revealed to you, whether it's a biological or medical condition, is it something that's actually being created by your mind? Or are you able to see something that's always there as a result of some biological condition you're struggling with? Yeah. Now we're back to the realm of possibilities in the three. And something that I think at least mainstream Western medical science would say is like, well, there's no such thing as spider women or gnomes or any of these other things. Because it's obviously, it has to be a hallucination. And yeah, that's a very real possibility. And then you look into other aspects, which would be called fringe science. But the beings that people commonly see while on dimethyltryptamine or the DMT experience, the God experience, ayahuasca. Yeah, which stories we've also shared a dead letter about that. And there's a, right. And then now apparently, I think, I don't know, is it Terence McKenna who said, I think there's a common eight types of beings that people see. It doesn't matter who you are. What does that consistency mean? What does that, are they then there as psychopomps to the ayahuasca DMT experience in the psychedelic drug department? Or is it just like everybody's brain is wired with these same eight characters? Not that people only see these eight characters, but there are often. Well, the one dead letter we did, the guy saw an omniscient, all-knowing seahorse. Well, yeah, there could be variations. So, like I said, is the condition then stripping that away like the DMT or the hallucinogenics and you're seeing what's there that is invisible to the naked eye? Or is it just always there? Or now you're beyond what mainstream science has been able to chart. But for personal experience, people would say, I think you have to take it as you're down to your own beliefs back once again. So, I think in Sarah's case, you could say like, well, that was a strange neurological condition and I'm going to chalk that up to my imagination or just something in my brain that was causing a hallucination, which obviously is a very real possibility. But there's some things about it that I would start to look at other factors, like if you're trying to investigate this. I remember Sarah talking about seeing this old hag type of woman down at the bottom of the stairs or she threw a pillow at it and it went right through her and there was no reaction. The pillow went right through. So, then there's no response. Again, it doesn't prove anything. But sometimes I think if you get an interactive response or there's other conditions or it's like getting an AVP. You can say you can get a recording of something, you know, an electronic voice phenomenon and it's just a few words. But it has more weight for me, as I often say, you know, the words are the answer to the question you asked. Then there's some context there. And it's like, okay, that to me, that means a little something extra. It still could be random. But then when it's a conversation, it gets less random and it gets less coincidental for me. And you know you're in trouble when you throw a pillow at the thing and then it throws it back at you. Well, that's amazing. It could also be a hallucination. And yells pillow fight. But here's the thing, the real thing you know is that the pillow is real and solid. Right. And when you see something move, even if it's PK, psychokinesis, movement, that's pretty extraordinary. Even if something, because things don't move on their own. They shouldn't. But sometimes they do. And here it's like, well, yeah. And again, I think you're right at the beginning. We all certainly know this, that when you start to mention, well, this happened in a dream or in sleep paralysis, that opens it up to a lot of thinking that this is just, you know, a sleep condition that you're just imagining this. It's part of your dream state. And again, we will never know. That's only a question and answer that's going to have meaning to Leah. Because what's happening to her and why is it following her around? Is it always just there or is it just, you know, something with her brain? Is it happening in her sleep? Is it connected to your practices? And, you know, I do like the fact or take some comfort in that they weren't mean. They weren't evil or pernicious. They were more playful. It's just that sometimes they're there. And now maybe, like I said, you know, you have a little friendship connection. You have a pen pal connection to the other side and imps. And it could be a lot worse. You could have a, speaking of Terry Lovelace again, you could have an abduction scenario where they're coming back. And this time they're not playful monkeys or you don't see them as such. Now they're terrifying and you have no control over them. And that's a much worse visitation. Well, Leah, we want to thank you so much for sending your story into the dead letter office. Gnomes, gremlins, tiny monkeys, like Forrest just mentioned, that Terry Lovelace had to deal with. Fairies and Pukwudgies are all part of human history across thousands of years in multiple cultures. If they were here to hurt us, we'd probably be in trouble by now. But we'll take the one waving goodbye to you on the dresser in Norway as a sign that you're moving on to greener pastures. Another dead letter has been delivered. And while some things are best left undisturbed, other stories demand to be told. Join us next week for another journey into the unknown. The Astonishing Dead Letter Office is hosted by Scott Philbrook and Forrest Burgess and is executive produced by Tess Feifel. The show is edited and mixed by Sarah Voorhees-Wendel at VW Sound. The theme is based on the Astonishing Legends theme by Judson Crane at Founder Music, arranged by Alan Carissia, who composes all the other music in the show. Tommy Beaver Design created the logo. The announcer is John Bolton. That's me. Stories are lightly edited for length, content, and readability, but otherwise presented as they're sent to us. We're always looking for more Dead Letters, so if you have a story of your own you'd like to share, email it to deadletteroffice at astonishinglegends.com. Please include how you would like to be credited, first name only, first name last initial, anonymous, a pseudonym, let us know. Due to the number of emails coming in, we often cannot respond, but we do read them all. No part of this show may be reproduced anywhere without permission. Copyright, Astonishing Legends Productions. Astonishing Legends is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things that people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit Progressive.com to see if you can save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations. 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